Vodka and Oreos

None of you may remember my former blog as it was housed on my now defunct Myspace page and was only rarely updated. I promise not to hold it against you.

Back in those days, I ran a feature called “Tales from the Cube” in which I chronicled my adventures in corporate America as a newly working mom with a brand new potato at home. I was full of promise and cynicism, excited to spread my wings in a business appropriate, suitably Office Space kind of way.  

 Here we are 5 years later, the potato is a pink headed demon child and I’m still with the same company…that’s about all that is the same.

 There was a fourth round of layoffs at my company yesterday, eliminating pretty much my entire team; a team that I helped to build from the ground up four years ago. I get that companies need to do what they need to do to survive and god knows I’m grateful that I still have my job but damnit, I am pissed off. And what is the point of having an internet based, relatively anonymous outlet with which to write, if I can’t bitch a little bit into the blog-o-sphere?

 In the ranks of those laid off we have single moms, young adults that were already barely making enough to continue living on their own, mom’s on maternity leave, and people who are right on the verge of retirement. Not a single one of them deserved to be laid off and not a single one of them gave any less than 110% every day of work. I will give my company credit though, they offered them a fantastic severance package and will not fight them on unemployment. I don't know what to say about the actual decision makers in the company, but as far as the supervisors and managers go, they have done everything they can to keep us our jobs for as long as possible and in failing that, have made sure that we are taken care of while looking for new ones.

 So why am I bitching?

 Because IT SUCKS! My people were working full time, and still on food stamps. They begged for overtime, they worked with fewer resources and higher demand in an ever changing industry with little complaint. They busted their asses, some of them for over 10 years…and now….nothing.

 As I mentioned, this is the FOURTH round of layoffs, and our company was one of the biggest employers in town. So needless to say, the job pool in our smallish town is getting more and more shallow.

 I should be happy right? They get a good package, I still have my job, they get unemployment, and everyone is acctually in pretty decent spirits about the whole thing. Then why am I so pissed?

 I think I feel  lied to.

 When we were kids, we were told to work hard, finish school, do your best, and you will be rewarded. I was given the impression that a college degree equaled riches beyond my wildest dreams and security for the rest of my life. Well kiddies…that’s bullshit.

I graduated from college with only fast food work experience, becuase that was the only kind of job I could support while taking 22 credits. I got knocked up right out of college (don't listen when they tell you that you can't have babies, until they acctually remove the baby making parts, you can still have babies. USE A CONDOM!) and took a year off to do the mom thing while I sorted my life out.

When I was ready to go back to work, I realized that short of a fancy piece of paper and the ability to bull shit my way into sounding like I know everything, I had no marketable job skills. I was blown away by this realization.

In school, we are told again and again that the shiny piece of paper was what you needed to make it in the world. No diploma, no future. Work hard, get your paper, get the job, get the car, get the house, get the life, live the dream. While the shiny paper certainly doesn't hurt anything, what it symbolizes is no longer the gaurenteed future and white picket fence of my dreams.

 There are no constants, no “for sure” and no guarantees. When I graduated from high school, slated to attend a nice, midrate state college just far enough from home that I wouldn’t have to see my mother every weekend, I thought the world was in front of me. I felt terrified and inspired and ready to take on the world.

 Here I am, 9 years later and I’m working in a cubicle, busting my ass for low, but adequate pay (just above the poverty line thank you!) and it means very little. A down turn in the economy and the work I’ve done, the heart I’ve put in and the big fat shiny degree I worked so hard for means bubkiss.

 Thanks a lot elementary school for filling my head with fantasy!

 Okay, enough bitching for today, I promise to come back with something suitably optimistic next posting so you don’t all run screaming for the razor blades and vodka.

 To my friends that got laid off, you are all handling this far better than I am, and I admire your optimism and positive outlook. Good luck out there guys and lets get together and drink copiously as soon as possible!

 PS: You know what helps EVERYTHING? Vodka and Oreos it’s a can’t miss combination!