Ladies Night...Oh What a Night

I needed a night off on Friday. Originally, my sister had invited me to go shopping at Wal-Mart and then i thought i would surprise her with dinner at the Olive Garden. While this scene is definitely an example straight from the "How to be an un-hip middle class soccer mom guide book", it inspired in me a lot of excitement since i hadn't been in the outside world with out kids or husband in quite sometime. But things fell through, and Matt and Rachel had to go down south to Mom's house for some outing they had planned.

Never before had the prospect, and then denial, of a trip to Wal-Mart affected me so deeply. I was devastated, and within that devastation, i realized just how badly i needed a night away.

I have been in the throws of a "I don't really like my husband" phase for the last couple of weeks, and I had it in my head that if I were to take a night away, i would be able to decompress, complain a little to my friends, and then come back refreshed and ready to love my home and family again.

While I love my family, and husband very much, there are these days where I look at him, and I can feel my forehead furrow and a feeling of irritation in my guts. How is hair is (or in this case, isn't) cut, the lack of shaving for days on end, the persistent smell of beer and cigarettes, everything about him is just driving me crazy this week, and becuase I love him, I knew that if I wanted to love him again, I needed a day to myself.

I called every friend i had in this area asking for some excuse to leave my house, shopping, a pedicure, a movie, dental work, but to no avail. Everyone was busy, tired or just not interested in Wal-Mart.

So, just when all hope seemed lost, an opportunity came up for me to go down south with Matt and Rachel and spend some time with my best friend of very nearly 20 years (sorry Shell, i know i wasn't supposed to say that) so I jumped on it and ran out of town.

There is something so therapeutic about spending time with your real live best friend. This is the one person who always knows what I am thinking, and doesn't ask me to explain it becuase she already knows why I'm thinking it. Best friends give you the opportunity to let things go unsaid, to be self righteous, narcissistic, and self absorbed.

Those of us who become wives and mothers, or are in anyway beholden to another in their life have a tendency to adapt a personality that is devoid of negativity, short on self indulgence, and empty of all selfish action. Honestly, sometimes you have to be selfish, self absorbed and a little negative. Everyday, we make meals, we soothe boo boos, we coddle male ego's and we forget about ourselves during the day to day grind of getting by.

Best friends are perfect for this sort of thing. Shelli tells me how wonderful I am, how mean everyone else is, how I am nearly always right, and how she and I are just the most awesome people ever, anyone who disagrees is obviously a moron.

Best friends can read your mind, when you start into a story with: "there is this guy who rides a unicycle up and down my street..." she is able to finish that sentence with "Oh god what an asshole!" becuase only she knows how much that would annoy me for no reason that any other person in the world could understand.

Best friends make it so you can get through those times where you don't like your life very much. They feed you special cookies that make you giggle, they buy large vats of dip and sushi platters and they cry with you and they laugh with you.

Best friends help you remember that even when husbands have unkempt facial hair and wear pajamas to family holiday events, and truly believes that playing video games is a viable career option, they love you, care for your family, that there was definitely something that made you fall in love with him originally.

A night off with a best friend, those questionable cookies, and a bottle of cheap wine does wonders for a persons disposition.

Go take a night off with your best friend this week, even if they are far away, try and call them alone and have some time that's just for the two of you.

Also, if anyone knows the origin/inventor of "suspect" cookies and/or brownies, let them know that they are an evil genius. Combining said suspect ingredients with baked goods? truly amazing.

Here the secret most people don't know, sell those suckers to more chubby mom's looking to relive their misspent youth, we just believe you when you tell us how much something is, we pay for delivery, and we are addicted to chocolate...trust me, fortune 500 opportunity here.